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Feminist Rants

November 17, 2016 by Lisa Leave a Comment

Small Steps Forward

Filed Under: Life Tagged With: Feminist Rants

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It’s been a heartbreaking few days. I was and am completely devastated by Hillary Clinton’s loss. In the wake of such a complete and utter disaster, it can be difficult to know what to do.

I started by grieving. I woke up Wednesday and sobbed harder than I have in a very long time. It was a time to mourn – mourning for women, the LGBT community, immigrants, Muslim people, disabled folks and anyone that is not a stright, white man; mourning for the future; mourning for Hillary herself. I spent the majority of the day this way. Then I got angry. I couldn’t believe the ignorance of so many. I felt, I’m sure like many of you, and I blamed men, third party voters, the 53% of white women voters and many more people that cast their vote for a racist, mysoginist, xenophobic monster.

And that’s when I decided that I could not sit and grieve forever. I had to channel my grief and anger into something good.

Inspired by Hillary’s speech Wednesday morning – “Never stop believing that fighting for what’s right is worth it ” – I decided to put those words into stitches. Sure, some feminist embroidery isn’t much, but it soothes my soul and hopefully – once I open an Etsy shop with these pieces – the souls of others.

But most importantly, I’m inspired to help. It can be a difficult thing to know where to start in the wake of such defeat, but a good place to start is by donating to a good cause. There are dozens of lists out there of organizations worthy of your time and money – here’s one to start. I encourage all of you to research these causes and give to an organization that means something to you. I just set up a monthly contribution to Planned Parenthood of Wisconsin, and I already feel about 10% better.

These are very small steps, of course, but they are steps forward nonetheless. To all of you awesome feminists, progresive warriors and woke baes out there, take care of yourselves, get angry and take action.

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March 25, 2016 by Lisa Leave a Comment

On Keeping Kaminski

Filed Under: Life Tagged With: Feminist Rants, Wedding

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Our wedding ceremony was by all accounts beautiful. We chose music that spoke to us, readings that touched us, exchanged heartfelt vows and, with the help of our officiant, created a very personal feel. At the closing, however, there was no “I now present for the first time as husband and wife: Mr. and Mrs. Michael Stock.”

That piece of the puzzle was deliberately missing by our own device. It was left out because I chose not to become a Stock but to remain a Kaminski. This decision, out of all my supposedly radical wedding decisions, was the one that was met with the most resistance.

Stock is simpler than Kaminski. What if you have children? Don’t you want to share a name? It’s just easier to have a single family name. Wouldn’t it be nice to to be “the Stocks?” Did you think about hyphenating? Don’t you want to be married? I heard it all, but I stood my ground. Don’t tell me what to do.

And then I argued with myself. You have your father’s name don’t you? Every woman in your family took their husbands’ names. Names are just arbitrary assignations. What about your hypothetical future children? Lots of feminists take their husbands’ names. And I had to quash those arguments too – they were all just reiterations of the same garbage.

I kept Kaminski because that’s the name I want.

I want my name because I don’t feel it’s necessary to take on a new identity – even if it’s just symbolic, even if it supposedly unifies us – after marriage.  I want my name because Michael was never asked if he was going to change his. I want my name because I didn’t want to deal with the hassle of updating everything from my passport to my auto insurance to my punch card at the pet store. I want my name because although I’m married to Michael, I am still part of my messy Michalek-Kowalewski-Kaminski family.

Despite being confident in my choice, writing this post is still emotional in some ways. Is Michael disappointed? Is his family offended? Am I not a good wife? And I have to fight those feelings because not taking Michael’s last name doesn’t mean I don’t love him or our familes. Not taking his name only means that I’m not buying into some outdated, patriarchal, hierarchical baloney.

And it took me years to master the cursive K. I don’t want that going to waste.

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October 4, 2014 by Lisa Leave a Comment

Milwaukee Film Festival: “She’s Beautiful When She’s Angry”

Filed Under: Adventure Tagged With: Feminist Rants, MKE

It’s Milwaukee Film Festival season, you guys and gals! That’s right – the best two weeks of the year are upon us.

Milwaukee Film Fest

This is my fourth year I’ve attended, and it seriously keeps getting better and better. Last year I hit up a record (for me) three films in a day, and I thought I had the peak with Band of Sisters – a documentary about American nuns working for change and social justice – and Signpainters.

But this year, oh this year, I found a new favorite. A favorite for all time I’m sure: She’s Beautiful When She’s Angry. This documentary about the feminist movement in the 1960s and 1970s was stellar. Beyond stellar. This film was packed with incredible photography and film footage from the era accompanied by interviews with a handful of important activists. Their stories and their opinions on feminism brought me to tears.

She's Beautiful When She's AngryWhat was even more incredible was that after the film, the director and two of the activists featured, Fran Beal and Mary Jean Collins, answered a few questions after the screening, and they were amazing! They were such a strong reminder that everyday people can have a huge impact on society – granted Beal and Collins said that no victory is permanent, which is why it’s imperative that women continue to fight for equal pay, access to birth control, the right to choose, and more.

I can’t do these women’s stories justice, which is why I recommend you watch the trailer here. And keep a lookout! She’s Beautiful When She’s Angry will be hitting theaters in New York and Los Angeles in December and hopefully more theaters nationwide after that.

Five stars!
Audience members are encouraged to rate the film after the screening. I’d give this a ten, but the scale only goes to five. Bummer.

Did anyone else have a chance to check the festival out? What were your favorites?

 

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